Siew yoke

If there's one productive thing I've been up to this holiday..it's working on my driving and cooking skills. Okay make that two haha. Been on a roll experimenting with my cooking capabilities haha and well..here's my latest attempt at making roast pork :)

Not too bad for a first attempt if I say so myself :) unfortunately the skin turned out too rubbery and burnt sigh but otherwise the taste was not too bad and appearance wise, it did look pretty authentic. My eldest sis and grandma ate quite a fair bit of it; that's the highest compliment a chef can receive hehe :)

In case you wanna know how I did it from a newbie's perspective, all I did was based on estimation and "feel". Marinate the pork belly with oyster sauce and preserved soya beans while sprinkling salt, black pepper and sesame oil on the skin. Poke holes into skin (i guess i didn't do this part so well) to prevent a rubbery texture on the skin, Leave it there for about half an hour before popping it into the oven for 30-45 minutes and once you scrape off the burnt parts and chop it up into even pieces, voila!

Love

"Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second minute of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don’t blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being “in love”, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.”

- Louis de Bernieres

I guess we're at the stage where we may or may not have gone past the honeymoon period. I know I do still feel the flutters in my tummy whenever I think of you, or when I see you before you see me when we're about to meet. Your smile and hugs from the back still gives me the tingles and makes me feel all gooey and mushy all inside and yet, there's the familiarity. Knowing how comfortable I am with you, the way I can easily talk to you about anything without having to worry about you judging me, be my silliest self and throw the mightiest tempers and with all my scornfulness you still love me through it. The comfortable silences we share, doing anything and almost everything in front of each other without any shame or embarrassment..I think that itself is wonderful. It's love at its rawest, stripped of all its superficialities and leaving two souls who love each other. Simple and beautiful.

Chocolate truffles

I've always loved the nama chocolates from Royce..the melt in your mouth texture and combined with the fact that it's not too overly sweet because of the cocoa powder - i've always been soooo impartial to those chocolates and i'd had to restrain myself from finishing the entire box in one sitting.

So imagine my joy when I saw the recipe and how wondrously easy it seemed and I wasn't proven wrong. Maybe I do need to figure out how to keep it in its solid form long enough at room temperature but otherwise it turned out perfect..yummy little snacks to pop into your mouth before and after meals. :}

So much for losing weight le sigh.

Of driving

If anything, I never imagined that learning to drive would be such a long and arduous journey. I remembered being soooo enthusiastic 2 years back, eagerly signing up for my BTT and skimming through forums for the best private instructor and ambitiously assuming that I could attain my license within 2-3 months..how wrong I was.

Went down to the test center on the wrong day for my BTT, later on forgot to go down to the center for my FTT, and 2 years down the road I had to renew my PDL, book my FTT test date again and I'm nearly back to square 1 despite having gone through 4 private lessons previously.

I was seriously contemplating whether I was even meant to drive or meant to be chauffeured around like my mum (heh)..I was really quite comfy being in the passenger seat as A drove me around in Adelaide :P..and I thought at least, to take the easy way through the Auto route and pray that it'll be a quick and relatively painless process to my license.

But at the end of the day, I guess if I really want a proper driving license, I might as well learn the full works for the same price..it's 2 in 1 right? Knowing how to drive a manual car means you'll never have a problem driving a Auto car..not that I'll be driving one but I guess it is a useful skill to learn. Despite mixed views from family and friends around me, I'm going ahead with manual anyway and I hope I'll have passed my test by May/June.

I must admit it hasn't exactly been an easy journey so far..it really tests my hand/leg co-ordination and sense of awareness simultaneously and for someone like me who's really damn blur and easily flustered, this really ain't my cup of tea. Not to mention obeying instructions from my instructor who's constantly rattling off instructions without breathing, 'First gear, press accelerator, release clutch, change lane, signal right, turn left, signal left, gear up, depress clutch and release slowly, reaching traffic light, gear down, brake lightly, clutch fully, brake fully, change back to first gear" which leaves me feeling damn stressed and mentally screaming in my head 'What what what WHuuuUTTT?"

In spite of this, there are its perks and..fun. It really does feel quite shiok and amazing realizing that you're the one in control of the car..and perhaps I'm feeling very naive but the thought of being able to drive makes me feel very grown-up haha. So.. I'm gonna grit my teeth and get myself through this even if it kills me, drains my money, takes up hours and hours of my life, even if I have to fail my TP 4 times before passing (oh dear god, I really hope not)..and I'll be one happy, proud driver with a Class 3 license in time to come :)

Ily

The cream of my coffee.

A ripple

You asked me why. I was silent but my mind was screaming at me to say something, to tell you what I felt, to say what's wrong. But I couldn't express myself, I couldn't tell you what was in my head. I wished I could, to save you the confusion and agony of being clueless but I really didn't know how to. You knew that I wasn't fine anyway, much as I said I was.

I really really wished in that instant you followed me out. I would have given almost anything to have you grab my arm, pull me back, hug me fiercely and that alone would have made me feel warm, safe and assured.

But you didn't. The train doors closed. I walked out of the station, feeling more alone than ever in a sea of strangers. And that short walk to the bus stop was heart-achingly long, cold and lonely as I fought against the involuntary urge to break down.